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» »Unlabelled » 5 Reasons Why Loving Someone Too Much Kills the Love

Can you ever love someone too much? As exciting as a new relationship can be, smothering a lover
with your affection will do more damage than good!

Contrary to love stories, chick flicks and epic
poems, there is such a thing as loving someone
too much. If you do not know when to stop
smothering someone, you run the risk of pushing
your newfound love away.
Many people are addicted to loving too much
and smothering a partner without even realizing
it. And while they do this, they ignore all the
warning signs, and are completely taken off
guard when their partner leaves them.
You need to remember that as exciting as being
in a new relationship is, you have to watch your
step. Although there is nothing wrong with
showering your partner with love, there is a fine
line between being attentive and smothering.
Do not be blinded by love and learn to pay
attention to the signals. When you constantly
cross the line of your partner’s tolerance and
annoyance, your partner will probably display
telltale signs that enough is enough, and that
they need you to back away.
Some of these signs include, but are not limited
to, pulling disappearing acts on you, making
excuses for breaking dates, and as a last resort,
breaking up with you!
Why loving someone too much pushes them
away
Smothering someone with love does not prove that
you love them. Rather, it displays signs of
insecurity and selfishness. There is nothing wrong
with showering your significant other with your
undying love and attention, but crossing that fine
line and traversing into the region of smothering is
easier than you think.
Many say that the reason they smother their loved
ones is because they are afraid of losing them. But
almost always, the truth is, the more you suffocate
them with love and attention, the further away
you are pushing them.
When you really think about it, loving someone does not mean you have to breathe down their necks and keep
tabs on them every minute of every day. Love is meant to be generous and trustworthy. If you cannot offer your
new love these fundamentals, then you are not ready to be in a relationship.

5 reasons why loving someone too much kills the love
Loving someone is wanting the best for them, even if it means you are not getting what you want. Here are five big
reasons why too much smothering will push your new love away.
#1 No one wants to lose their freedom
Wing clipping is the act of trimming a bird’s flight feathers so that it is no longer able to fly. Do not do this to
the person you love. When you clip their wings, you are forcing them to be tethered to you. By smothering them
with too much affection, you are taking away their freedom. This means that they are unable to make decisions
without having you burning holes into the back of their head.
By smothering your partner, you are completely disregarding what they want for themselves. You have to give your
loved one the chance to be free, even after you are married. This does not mean turning a blind eye to extramarital
affairs. It simply means letting them make decisions without the fear of having you coming down hard on them.

Do not place the person you love in a gilded cage because no matter how wonderful it is, it is an inescapable
prison that no person should have to live in. Never clip your new love’s wings as nothing good will come out of it.
Let them have their freedom and if you are really meant to be, you will be together no matter what.
#2 Stunt the relationship’s growth
Smothering someone will stunt, not just the relationship’s growth, but your partner’s growth as well. This is true
when it comes to dating someone new, especially if both of you are young. You must give yourself and your
partner the chance to be two separate individuals. You have to also give the other person sufficient time and space
to accept you into their lives, no matter how much you love each other.
Loving someone means respecting their needs and desires and not forcing your way of life onto another person.
Unless your partner is ready to fully accept you into his or her life and change their habits to make room for
yours, you cannot break down the door and invite yourself in. Respect your partner’s individuality and do not
stunt his or her growth. You have to respect your partner’s wishes and desires and let the relationship healthily
grow on its own.
If you smother your new love with something they did not ask for, you will undoubtedly come off as needy and
greedy and you can bet your bottom dollar that you will be single again in no time at all.
Building the perfect relationship takes time and you have to remember that if you rush things and try to take
control of your partner, you will never get the relationship you crave for, as it will forever be stunted.

#3 Stifle their independence
You will not give your significant other the important chance to be who they are if you smother them with too
much attention. Decisions that they make have to involve you, whether they want to or not. From simple things
such as when to hop into the shower, to what they want to have for dinner, to deciding whether to make a career
move to another country, you snatch away your partner’s chance of being independent when you are constantly
in their face.
The last thing that you want to do is to oppress the person you love. You have to give them the independence that
every human being needs to make their own decisions and grow into the person they were meant to be. If you try
to limit your new love’s ability to make choices, it is only a matter of time before they start realizing that their
entire life is a prison and they will do all that they can to break free.

#4 Familiarity breeds contempt
Familiarity breeds contempt, and as many couples will tell you, boredom as well. Everyone needs their space. Even
old married couples appreciate spending some time away from each other. Absence certainly makes the heart grow
fonder as it gives your partner the chance to miss you

Most of the time, people tend to appreciate what they have when they are away from it, and relationships are no different. If you smother your loved one with too much attention and neglect to give them the much needed space and time apart from you, you will inevitably invite in contempt and a sense of boredom. This does not mean that long-term romances are boring. It simply means that the two parties have figured out how to balance peaceful space and love without smothering each other. If you are with someone new, you will do well to remember that being in a relationship is a delicate balancing act that takes time and effort to master. Give your new love some space and let him have his boys’ night out or her night out with the girls, without the need to come down hard on your partner. Remember that familiarity breeds contempt, so always give each other space and time for friends and hobbies outside of the relationship. [ #5 It displays desperation When you smother a new love, you will undoubtedly come off as being needy and desperate, even if you are not. Always remember that no one wants to be in a relationship with someone who cannot stand on their own two feet. You have to take it upon yourself to be independent and prove to not just your new love, but to yourself that you can cope with the responsibility of being in an adult relationship. Love demands trust and if you cannot give your partner space without having to play 20 questions, you are displaying signs of being insecure. Not just that, you new love will think that you are not able to deal with being alone and that you are terrified of losing them. No one wants to be with someone who comes off as being crazy and needy, so be careful not to smother your partner as it comes off as looking desperate, a totally unattractive quality to have in a mate. As much as you love your partner and love being around them all the time, remember that loving them too much and smothering them will only cripple them. And along the way, you’ll end up crippling yourself too.

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